by Brad Weaber

In a recent random phone survey, nearly two dozen buyers and suppliers were asked "what they hate most" about negotiation. The hoteliers were nearly unanimous in their No. 1 complaint, summed up in this comment:

"I hate it when we spend hours going over all the planner's needs and come to a final agreement... only to find the planner has held back some items to throw at me after I've committed my hotel."

"I lose all respect and confidence in that client and feel like both the hotel and myself have been cheated."

These strong words were echoed by every hotelier I spoke with. Other complaints:

"Many planner's don't want a 'win-win.' They want an 'I win, hotel loses' negotiation. They don't want to know about a hotel's problems. But they'll spend all sorts of time explaining their own in order to wrest additional concessions."

More than half the hoteliers interviewed for the accompanying article stated that they would rather have a meeting manager ask for six guest rooms at a 50-percent discount than three rooms on a complimentary basis.

Their reasons differed, but most agreed that it was more difficult to explain the comps to upper management. "On paper," explained one hotelier, "the discounted rooms mirror the 'employee discount' room rate. Management never challenges those." The opposite is true at hotels that don't add in comp rooms when they figure the average rate. In this case, comps are better than discounted rooms.

"Some speakers advocate the 'ask for everything so that you get something' negotiating strategy. That strategy includes plenty of 'wants,' as well as 'needs.' But because of the sheer volume of requests, they are forced to say 'no,' and then they come off as the 'bad guys.' And that makes it difficult to maintain supportive relationships with clients."

While not at the top of anyone's list, the number and timing of changes was also a concern:

"It's frustrating to spend hours moving groups around in our meeting space to fit a group only to find out later that they need different space... or want to change the dates altogether."

Finally, a few hoteliers noted the hypothetical client who will call up and mention that a competitive hotel will beat a quoted rate by $35. In fact, the hotelier knows, the other property would never quote such a rate. So he won't bite. But he will make sure that word of the client's dishonesty is passed among the brethren. Remember: You have many pieces of business but only one reputation!

Meeting managers were not without their own complaints. Many dealt with the same issues of poor communication:

"How can a hotel accept my agenda with all specifications when, in fact, much of the space is already committed to another group?

"It's almost like they think my meeting will magically change to fit into the few rooms they have left."

Buyers were also upset by what one characterized as "bait and switch" tactics:

"We receive communications from hotels that promise or infer agreement on negotiation points. Everything 'sounds good.' 'Nothing's a problem.' I report that to my boss and, in some cases, the board. When the hotel changes its mind – for whatever reason – I'm the one who has to explain. I resent that."

Meeting managers specifically complained about sales executives who lacked the courage to say "no." And they noted that the words "that's the lowest rate we can offer over that period," if not true, can come back to haunt a hotel.

"The salesperson who says those words mistakenly believes that a planner or the planner's fellow employees or members of the association will never hear about the rates given to other groups in the hotel.

"But when the truth does get out, feelings will rise. And reputations are hurt."

No matter which side of the desk you sit on, we all have our pet peeves about the negotiation process. We all have our personal war stories. But few of them occur when communication is open and honest.

First published in: Convene Magazine, October 1994